Hitchhiking in Borneo

In February 2011 I took the kids to Kota Kinabalu, Malaysia.  Kota Kinabalu is part of Malaysian Borneo and I'll let Wiki explain the island a little further:
"Borneo (Indonesian: Kalimantan) is the third largest island in the world and is located north of Java Island, Indonesia, at the geographic centre of Maritime Southeast Asia.
The island is divided among three countries: Brunei, Indonesia and Malaysia. Approximately 73% of the island is Indonesian territory."

Let me begin our February 2011 adventure at the beginning.  The kids and I arrived at the airport in Kota Kinabalu and quickly hailed the taxi that we hoped would deliver us to the Shangri La Rasa Ria resort.  Friends and tripadvisor alike had sworn the Rasa Ria was heaven on earth and we were due for a successful holiday after failing the Philippines the previous month.  The resort is about a 45 minute drive from the airport but after about 20 minutes our taxi pulled off the road and stopped.  By this time we were too far outside of the city to walk back and I had no idea where we were. The driver spoke very little english but I gathered that the taxi had broken down.  I asked/demanded that the driver arrange for another taxi take us the rest of the way.  At that moment it was excruciatingly hot, the kids were in bad moods from being woken up at the crack of dawn to catch our flight, and the driver's cell phone died.  Great.

After standing on the side of the road for about 15 minutes with the kids and our luggage a car pulled over and the driver started talking to our taxi driver.  Both men were speaking Bahasa Malaysia so I had no clue what was going on but it seemed like they were arguing.  Without saying a word to me, the taxi driver took our luggage and put it in the back of this stranger's car and motioned for us to get in the backseat.  Keep in mind the car in question was not a taxi and every travel guide published warns of the dangers of hitchhiking or accepting rides from strangers.  To say I was uneasy with this arrangement would be an understatement.  I asked the taxi driver if he knew this other person and he said no.  I asked if there was a payphone somewhere within walking distance and he said no.  I felt like I was in a nightmare.  I was alone in a foreign country with my kids, stranded, and with no way to call anyone for help.  Once again my decision to purchase a cheap phone that's useless anywhere but Singapore had come back to haunt me.  Great.

I didn't really have any better option than to hope and pray that this stranger was not a terrorist/lunatic/Islamic fanatic/etc. He looked like a normal guy but so do a lot of serial killers.  He also had a plethora of stuffed animals on his dash board which I hoped meant he had an innocent heart.  What if this guy was a criminal?  What on earth was I going to do?  Use my purse strap as a garrote?  No one that knew me had any idea where I was or who I was with and the United States government had recently upgraded it's warnings to Americans traveling in this part of Asia.  Great.

Thankfully this person DID take us to our resort and I've never been so glad to be out of a car in my life.  The staff at the hotel told me that he had been on his way to pick up his daughter from school when he saw us on the side of the road and had stopped to help.  Thank God for good samaritans and, yes, I'm immensely ashamed that all those other thoughts crossed my mind.  I'm not going to waste time raving about the Shangri La Rasa Ria because anyone who has ever been there already has.  This resort is one of the most kid friendly I've found.  The rooms accommodate families, the kid's club is amazing, the prices are reasonable, the beach is clean, the pool is safe for a variety of swim abilities, and there are a myriad of activities for all ages.  We spent some time with orangutans, the kids rode horses on the beach, Baby Girl Castello and I enjoyed the spa, Miniman and I both won blow dart competitions, and we spent hours in the pool and on the beach.  It didn't hurt that the food and staff were amazing.  I went back to the Rasa Ria for a romantic getaway in June 2011 with The Man and we both agreed that it was one of our best vacations.  We left Kota Kinabalu completely satisfied and with memories I think we'll cherish forever.  Great.

I failed at the Philippines

All of our trips start the same way: I decide on a location, read every review possible, check multiple sights for rates, talk to friends who've been where I want to go, and so on. I create a plan and then a backup plan and then a backup plan for my backup plan. The Man often tells me that some of his favorite trips started with no plan, a willing friend, a pack of Ramen noodles, and whatever cash he could dig out of the couch cushions. For our Philippine adventure I thought I would employ a somewhat similar mindset and try to let go and see what happened. I checked weather forecasts, booked our flights and hotel, and scheduled a dive trip but everything else was left up to chance.

When we arrived in the Philippines it was raining and the streets were starting to hold water. Not the best way to start a holiday but I hoped the bad weather wouldn't last. I had chosen a hotel that was significantly more expensive than most in Cebu because it was built around a water park and on the beach and hoped that I had spent the money well. I hadn't. The people at the front desk were rude and made it clear that our presence was annoying. Everything at the hotel was outrageously expensive which made it hard to relax. I tried to convince myself that money is only paper but that only goes so far when you're being charged 10x the market rate for everything.

On day 2 we woke up and the streets were completely flooded but the dive company managed to pick us up and get us to the rendezvous point anyway. All along the way we dodged chickens, dogs, and kids that were all playing in the muddy streets. I had been looking forward to scuba diving for months and had high hopes for our day. Unfortunately, I was pretty disappointed in what we found. We were diving in a marine sanctuary but regularly swam over traps, nets, and litter. On the other hand, we saw hundreds of huge blue starfish so that was pretty special. The weather was decent while we were diving but the rain returned as soon as we got back to the shore and didn't stop for hours. When we got back to our hotel, The Man and I relaxed under thatched roof umbrellas while the kids enjoyed the water park. Because I had not planned this trip to the hilt I had no idea where to go for a good meal and the hotel staff couldn't have been less helpful. We ended up eating at the pool which was nice but I had really wanted to leave the hotel and experience some local foods.

On day 3 I was determined to get away from the hotel and asked the staff at the front desk to direct us to some of the local markets. Local markets are rustic, crowded, chaotic, and almost always a good place to see a variety of people, goods and produce and get some great pics. The hotel staff told the taxi driver where to take us so I was more than disappointed when we were dropped off at a shopping mall. A shopping mall? Really? I think I was quite clear about where I wanted to go and this wasn't it. If I had wanted to shop in a modern mall I would have stayed in Singapore. Again, I hadn't planned this trip like I normally do so I couldn't name the market I wanted to go to and was at the mercy of strangers. The entrance to the mall was blocked by two armed guards who searched our bags before allowing us to enter which was more than a little unsettling. On a positive note, that afternoon The Man and Miniman got to go para sailing. BGC had gotten to para sail in Destin a few years before and there's nothing Miniman loves more than finally getting to do all the things his much older sister has experienced. Miniman was only 4 but had absolutely no fear and it was a joy to watch his face light up when he and his dad took off. The parasailing also marked the only time of that entire day that it wasn't raining. Miniman and Baby Girl Castello didn't mind the rain as they were enjoying the water park. I, on the other hand, was regretting my "let's see what happens when I don't plan anything" experiment. Normally, I would have had several rainy day plans but not this time so I was stuck. We paid a small fortune for the very non-Filipino dinner at the hotel that night which didn't do much for my mood.

On day 4 it rained and rained and rained. Our flight left later in the day so the kids had plenty of time to enjoy the water park. It killed me that we hadn't learned a single thing about the Philippines, hadn't learned any of the language, hadn't eaten any authentic food, and hadn't seen anything we would remember forever. Constantly reminding myself that The Man rarely travels with us and it would be months before he went anywhere with us again only served to drag me down further.

So, my lack of planning led to my failing the Philippines. I feel that I wasted the opportunity to get to know a place that graces the cover of travel magazines on a regular basis, to get to know a people that are famous for their love of life, and to show the kids something they may never have the chance to experience again. If I get the chance to go back I'll research for hours, plan like crazy, and hopefully find the Philippines everyone else seems to know.

Tour de Disappointment

In December 2010 we traveled back to America for what I now call Tour de Disappoinment. Things started off badly when there was an issue at work that forced The Man to changed his flight which meant he wouldn't be flying with us. I've traveled extensively with the kids by myself but that doesn't mean it's easy and I was hoping to have a little help this time. I was also hoping to be tall but that didn't happen either so The Man left for the US before us and would be coming back to Singapore before us as well. Lovely.

I call the December trip the Tour de Disappointment because we disappointed people everywhere we went. When we got to someones house they were disappointed that we hadn't gotten there sooner. When it was time to leave they were disappointed that we had to go so soon. There just wasn't enough of us or time to go around so we spread misery all over the great state of Louisiana. It's great to be missed and all but I want people to be happy and it was tough to see the looks on peoples faces when we had to tell them goodbye. Watching tears roll down your grandmother's cheeks is hard. Knowing you're the cause of the tears is killer. Compounding the problem was the fact that we didn't know when we'd be back to the US so we had to leave without being able to tell people when we'd see them again. I was like a defective cheerleader trying to boost the kid's and our family's spirits and it was exhausting.

Of course it wasn't all bad. We met our new neice and visited tons of friends and family. We ate good food, felt a chill in the air, and tried to make the most of our limited time. The Man killed a nice deer on his last day in the US and I got the kid's pictures with Santa. We annoyed everyone by marvelling non stop at how cheap things are in America, how awesome dishwashers are, and how nice it was to drive again.

On our way to the airport to begin the 24 hour journey to Singapore both of my kids were crying and their grandparents had red eyes and wet cheeks. The benefits of the expat lifestyle are endless but the price can be pretty steep as well.

Poor Parenting 101

To get ready for October's trip you'll need the following tutorial:

How to feel like a schmuck:

1. Plan a trip to Hong Kong Disney well in advance to secure cheap airfare. Non-refundable, non-transferable tickets are really best for this exercise. You'll need to purchase plane tickets so far in advance that your kid's school schedule will not have been published for the month you will be at Disney. Timing is crucial.

2. Tell your kids all about the trip and how fabulous it's going to be. Really talk it up big so they'll be extra excited. Tell your oldest child that she'll get to miss one day of school and add the comment, "how important can one day of school be anyway?" Cue the foreboding music.

3. When the school calendar is finally released just ignore it. Don't bother looking at the month you'll be at Disney because your kids are NEVER sick and NEVER miss a single day of school so missing one random Monday is no big deal. Raise the volume on the foreboding music.

4. Three weeks before the trip you will want to realize that your oldest child - who is super excited about the trip and never, ever asks for anything - has a major exam on the Monday that you will be at Disney. You may need to check to be sure your child's school has a very strict policy against make up exams in advance.

5. Tell your child she will NOT be going to Disney. If you think this step is the hardest you're wrong because now you will tell your child that you and brother are still going.

6. Now, if you've survived to the end of step 5, you already know how it feels to be a schmuck. If you want to take the experience to the next level you'll need to have an amazing oldest child. The last step is also what will make this a particularly lasting memory. If you do not have a amazing oldest child you're in luck because said child will throw a snot-slinging fit and you can at least have the peace of knowing they "didn't deserve to go to Disney anyway" while on your way to the mall to buy back their affection. If, like me, your child has a grace and dignity beyond her years she will tell you it's ok, she understands, and she hopes you have a great time anyway. Don't fling yourself off the top of a building just yet. The fun isn't over. Then hope that your child tells you that she understands how hard it must have been for you to have to tell her she couldn't go. Dante's version of Hell was a walk in the park compared to this torture. Last but not least have your oldest child stay home studying all weekend so she can do well on her test while you are at Disney with her brother and without her.

7. At this point you may not want to be left alone for fear of hanging yourself with your "World's Greatest Mom" t-shirt.

Hong Kong Disney

Miniman was only three when we moved to Singapore so he has very few memories of our life back in Houston. One of the things he does remember clearly was the last Halloween we celebrated before the big move. We did all the traditional Halloween actvities: made candy apples, visited a pumkin patch, bought a boat-load of candy, attended the parties at the kid's schools, carved pumpkins, and went trick or treating. That year, like every year, all of the parents and kids on our street dressed up and went trick or treating together and Miniman thought it was the greatest night EVER.

When we moved to Singapore I had high hopes of continuing to celebrate all the holidays we enjoyed back home but apparently other cultures do not share our enthusiasm for Halloween. Sure, I can find some candy and a few costumes in Singapore but the Halloween spirit just isn't here. There is no pumpkin picking, no hay rides, no apple cider and certainly no chill in the air. The area of Singapore I live in does not trick or treat as most cultures do not observe the holiday and would have no idea why my children were knocking on their door and asking for treats while dressed in strange clothes.

Our first Halloween here in 2009 was a total bust so I was determined to make up for it in 2010. I planned a trip to Hong Kong Disney over Halloween weekend and invited our friends the Ketricks. Miniman and Hello Kitty (obviously not her real name) Ketrick were in the same class in school and adore each other. She's the Jenny to his Forest. Miniman constantly surprises me with how thoughtful he is towards Hello Kitty. One time we were all sharing a taxi and Hello Kitty mentioned she was getting hot sitting near the window. Miniman traded places with her at the next red light so she would be in the middle of the taxi and out of the sun. He does things like that for her often and without expecting anyting in return.
Hong Kong Disney was the perfect size for two four year olds. It's not nearly as large as the park in Orlando and the majority of the rides were for smaller kids which made me feel a little better that BGC couldn't come. We could make it from one character appearance to the next without having to hop on a train or kill ourselves sprinting from one end of the park to the other. The lines weren't anything like they are in Orlando either. On Day 1 we arrived in Hong Kong, checked into our hotel, and hit the park. We stayed in the Disney Hollywood Hotel and I was really happy with our choice. First, they let two families share a room which a lot of places don't allow. Second, the buffet breakfast was well done and had something for everyone. Third, nothing beats a free shuttle to the front door of the park. Day 2 (Halloween) we hit the park early and didn't leave until they were about to lock the gates. Because it was Halloween we let the kids wear their costumes all day and I would estimate that strangers took roughly 80 bazillion picturs of the kids that day. Day 3 we took the kids to the character breakfast and caught our flights back to Singapore.

Leah and I decided before we left Singapore that we would tag team parent. If either child acted up when their parent was occupied the other adult had permission to lay down the law. The kids were excellent so it wasn't an issue but it's good to have things like that agreed upon beforehand. We also each put a specific amount of money in an communal envelope that paid for things we all used like taxis and tips which was so much easier than trying to split things or keep up with who paid for what.
If I had it all to do over again I wouldn't change a thing. I would stay in one of the two Disney hotels, stay at the park until it closed (after the parade the park cleared out and we could ride the rides as many times as we wanted to), and attend the character breakfast. The characters did a good job of visiting each and every table during the breakfast which helped to keep the kids in their seats and not fighting for a chance to pull Pluto's tail.

On the way home, both of the kids were asleep on the plane within 10 minutes of takeoff and slept until we landed in Singapore. It wasn't the traditional American Halloween but it wasn't too shabby either.

Baby Girl Castello ended up having a really good weekend with her dad. They went bike riding on Palau Ubin, ate chili crabs, and enjoyed some much needed daddy/daughter time.

Surf, Sleep, Spa

Our trip to China was nothing short of spectacular and has rightfully earned a spot on my list of the Top 10 Places I'm Glad I took my Kids before They Grew Up.

Once we got back to Singapore I had just enough time to unpack, wash clothes, and fill the fridge before my solo adventure began. That's right. For the first time in my adult life I took a trip (that wasn't work related) by myself. It all started at a mom's coffee meeting. I was having breakfast with a group from Miniman's school when we were joined by a Mom that had just returned from a trip to Bali. She told us all about the surfing, the clubs, the shopping, and that fact that she went BY HERSELF. Wait, what? Moms go places by themselves? Hand to God, it had never occurred to me that a grown woman with a husband and kids might take a vacation that didn't revolve around family or friends.

I had really, really wanted to learn how to surf when we were in Bali in August but ran out of time. The idea of a solo trip intrigued me but I kept feeling that, as a stay-at-home-mom, going somewhere exotic by myself was greedy and extravagant. The funny part was that I didn't think either of those things about the mom at the coffee meeting. So anyway, I started planning a trip to Bali for the whole family when The Man informed me he wouldn't go. He was training for a 50km trail race and the trip would interfere with his training. I couldn't just delay the trip until after the race as it was already mid-September and October marks the beginning of Bali's monsoon season. I had to choose between not going at all and going by myself. Just for laughs I checked out plane ticket and hotel prices and was surprised by how much they had gone down since it was the end of tourist season. I took this as a sign that I should go. Alone.

My friends enjoyed teasing me that this was my Eat, Pray, Love trip but I was quick to retort that at this point in my life my novel would be titled something more like Surf, Sleep, Spa. I arrived late Friday night, contacted my family back in Singapore, and slept like death. Saturday I took my first surf lesson, spent a few hours in the spa, shopped, and slept like death. Sunday I surfed, spa'd, and caught my flight back to Singapore. Surfing was a lot harder than my kids made it look but I enjoyed every single minute. Any hopes I had of being a natural on a surfboard were quickly dashed and I spent most of the first lesson like this:

and this:

and this:

But by Sunday I could do this:

I'm totally ok with the fact that I'll never go pro. In less than 48 hours I learned how to surf somewhat, bought great souvenirs, relaxed at the spa, and was ready to return home well rested and refreshed.

Unfortunately, my absence at home had been a total disaster. The Man got sick Friday night right after I left and spent the entire weekend in bed. Miniman had to miss a birthday party he was looking forward to attending because I wasn't there to take him and his Dad was too sick to go. BGC was forced to spend her weekend fetching meds for her Dad and keeping her little brother alive. When I walked through the door Sunday night I was greeted by three people who vowed not to ever let me leave them again. Baby Girl Castello hugged me the hardest. I think that weekend gave her a little insight as to what my job really involves and she wanted no part of it. Good thing I got all that sleep in Bali.

Train to the Terracotta Warriors

There were basically four options to get from Beijing to Xi'an to see the Warriors: 1) plane 2) train 3) automobile 4) bus. As far as option 1 was concerned, we have taken our share of planes so flying seemed too ordinary. Option 2 was intriguing as trains are a huge part of Chinese culture and the way millions of residents undertake long distance travel. Option 3 was too expensive. Option 4 just wasn't going to happen. Apparently the kids and I were the only 3 people in China that don't smoke so the thought of spending hours on a crowded bus that was a glorified cancer factory wasn't appealing. If I'm going to give up a lung it's going to be for something amazing, not someone else's cigarette. Also, bus travel isn't all that fast and I didn't want to lose a lot of time in transit. Option 2 was the clear winner as the train was overnight so we wouldn't lose any daylight hours.

Miniman was able to travel for free as long as he slept with me which meant we'd be sharing our four bed cabin with two total strangers. As the kids and I had never travelled by train before, I had no clue as to train etiquette. For instance: Do you tell the other people in the cabin goodnight when the lights go out? No. Do you wear pajamas for an overnight trip or sleep in your day clothes? Sleep in your day clothes. I didn't see anyone in pj's. Who decides when to turn out the lights at night or turn them on in the morning? This is decided for you. At a certain time an announcement comes on the loud speaker nicely telling everyone that it's late and time to go to sleep. Another announcement tells you that it's time to wake up and start getting ready for your arrival.
Our arrival in Xi'an was met with absolute chaos. There weren't any signs to tell me where to go and there wasn't anyone to ask as no one spoke english. No one. There were buses and people and tour groups everywhere and I had a hard time finding the one bus I was looking for. My kids were the only non-asian kids that I saw and everyone wanted to touch their faces and their hair and get pictures of them and with them. It was enough to make me start to panic a little. About the time I started to really regret the decision to travel to Xi'an by myself with the smalls I stumbled upon the elusive bus I was looking for that would take us from the train station to the Warriors.

The terracotta warriors didn't disappoint. The level of detail in the faces, clothes and animals is mind blowing. The three hangars that house the warriors are laid out in large rectangles which means there is plenty of space for viewing regardless of the hordes of tourists. The site itself is actually lower than the viewing platform so you're looking down on the remains of Qin Shi Huang's army. Many warriors have been put back together and are standing upright but many more lay in piles of random heads, torsos, clothes, etc. Not all of the artifacts have been uncovered and it was interesting to see a working archaeological dig site. As much as Miniman and BGC are not sightseers, they really loved seeing the warriors and learning about how they were discovered and how experts think they were made.

On our way to the train station to catch the overnight train back to Beijing, we stopped at the onsite Subway and enjoyed sandwiches we could just of easily have been eating in America. The Subway in Xi'an sells Corona and the dichotomy of eating an American sandwich and drinking a Mexican beer while in Xi'an, China didn't go unnoticed. It really is a small, small world after all.

Our trip got off to a bit of a rough start but turned out to be one of the things my kids talk about the most when we talk about China. I guess new experiences aren't always easy but are almost always worth it. Now that we had walked on the Great Wall and viewed the warriors in their final resting place I could afford to just relax and enjoy the rest of what China had to offer.